Forgiving God

In the last post I talked about separating the actions someone does from him as a person. That will lead the way to "let him off the hook" so you can forgive him of the things he has done against you or the things he did not do that you feel he should have done. Let's take this one step further. What if we did that for God?

Too many Christians are so consumed with focusing on what God DOES for them that they forget to worship Him for who He IS. Maybe it is a time for a "self check" on this. When is the last time you got alone with God WITHOUT a prayer request list and just enjoyed His presence? That is probably a foreign concept to most people, but it is a very important question to pose. Think about any person you love. The closer the relationship, the more the desire to just be with him/her. You really don't need to be entertained; you just want to be with the person. Couples who have been married for years and have a close relationship can simply be together holding hands and not even have to talk to enjoy one another. God is not interested as much in what you can DO for Him as much as He in in just being with you. You reach a deeper level of intimacy with Him when you are more interested in being with Him than you are in what He can DO for you.

Yes, God wants to bless us. In fact, the Bible says that "it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the Kingdom." (Luke 12:32 KJV) However, what happens when we don't get our prayers answered the way we think they should be answered? What happens if we don't get the job we thought we should have? What if we don't get healed the way we thought it should happen? What if we don't see relationships restored when we think they should? If we don't separate what God does or does not do from Him, we will blame Him and get angry with Him. We get so focused on our situations and "needs" that we forget He sees the bigger picture and knows what is best. We forget that ultimately He has the last word and "He will cause all things to work together for those who love Him and who are called according to His purposes." (Romans 8:28)

We do praise God for what He does for us, but we worship Him for who He is. Don't get stuck in the outer courts just focusing on His deeds. Go on in to the Holy of Holies and worship God for who He is. You will then get all of who He is that includes what He does! Then when you receive His blessings, you will also know His heart. You will start to see the bigger picture and understand why God does or doesn't do things in our ways or timing. You will be like Moses instead of the Children of Israel. The Children of Israel knew God's deeds, but Moses knew His ways. (See Psalm 103:7)

I pray for God's wisdom on how to communicate this truth. I see many people who need to forgive God before they can go on the forgiveness journey and forgive others. WHAT? Forgive God? He hasn't sinned! That's right, but He has allowed things to wound us. It's when we can separate the things God does or does not do from Him that we can release God from the offenses we hold against Him and be free indeed from a root of bitterness that we may not even realize we had. We will then start seeing why He allows hard times and begin to actually thank Him for those trials that burn out all the "dross" of self-centeredness and draw us closer to Him.

Separation in a Positive Light

Most of the time when we think of "separation," it is in a negative way. Division is often an occurrence that includes offense. Oh the other hand, there are times when separation is a good thing. One of those times is what I learned from Bruce and Toni Hebel in their new book Forgiving Forward. They teach that in order to forgive someone, you first have to separate his actions from him as a person.

That's what we ask God to do for us when we pray the Lord's prayer. "Forgive us our debts." When we learn to separate the person from his actions, we learn how to love the sinner and hate the sin. We need to remember that "we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places." (Eph. 6:12 NKJV) The person that did an action (or lack of action) that offended us is merely a person. The source of the offense is truly the enemy of our souls, the devil and the demonic angels that follow him. That's not to say that we don't have responsibility when we commit a sin, but we are dealt with by God. We cannot truly deal with people who hurt us. We have to release them to God; He's the only One who can truly deal with them.

This act of separating the person from his actions not only helps us to forgive him from his negative actions, it will also help us to not put someone up on a pedestal when he does positive actions. Just as we remember that the negative actions someone does toward us comes from the true enemy, we also need to remember that the good actions someone does to us come from the Lover of our souls, God Almighty. If I do great deeds to help someone, I want that to point them to God, not me.

Do WHAT?

The Christian faith is full of paradoxes. What is a paradox? The first definition on dictionary.com is "a statement or proposition that seems self-contradictory or absurd but in reality expresses a possible truth."

Think about it...

I am to die to my self in order that I may live.

I am to give so that I can receive.

I am to humble myself to God, and He will lift me up.

I have found all of these seemingly absurd statements to be very true. They are not easy to do in the natural, but once you can get past the natural and allow God to give you a supernatural desire, a life of satisfaction is the result. There is another paradox in the Bible that seems harder than any of them. We are told to bless those who persecute us. WHAT?!

Let's look at this closer...

Romans 12:14-19 (NIV) - "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord. On the contrary:
'If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.' Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

Another passage says...

1 Peter 3:8-10 (NIV) "Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For,
'Whoever would love life
and see good days
must keep his tongue from evil
and his lips from deceitful speech.' "

What if more people did this? How would the world change? That would definitely be walking out the talk. Jesus was our example. Isaiah prophesied Jesus, the Messiah's death many years before it actually happened when he wrote

"He was oppressed and afflicted,
yet he did not open his mouth;
he was led like a lamb to the slaughter,
and as a sheep before her shearers is silent,
so he did not open his mouth." (Is 53:7 NIV)

Even in the worst of persecution, Jesus did not try to defend Himself. Yes, His accusers seemingly won the battle when they killed Him. However, three days later, look what happened! He was resurrected from the dead and conquered death, hell and the grave! I don't care what the enemy tries to do to silence God and His people. God always has the last word!

I recently told a friend this who is facing some crazy accusations that have gotten out of hand. She responded, "That's Jesus. He's God!" I replied, "Yes, but where does Jesus live?" She knew when she said, "In me!"

Lord, help us to look to You for our approval instead of people. Their unkind words will not hurt as bad if we do not need their approval. That way when they persecute us, we will have what we need to show them grace and repay their evil with good. Help us to show them Your goodness. May our actions be the seed that draws them to Your kindness which leads them to repentance. Help us to have the grace to release them to You, knowing that You can take care of the situation much better than we can!

When to Say "I'm Sorry!"

When is it right to say "I'm sorry!"? When we make a mistake, disobey God, or hurt others we need to apologize for sure. God is pleased with a truly repentant heart. However, how often do we say "I'm sorry" over and over again? Why wasn't the first time enough? Do we think God will not forgive us the first time? Do we have a problem forgiving ourselves? We need to remember 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." God forgives us the first time we ask forgiveness. When we do not forgive ourselves we are putting ourselves above God. God is God. If He says someone is forgiven, they are forgiven!

Another time we say "I'm sorry" when we shouldn't is when we apologize for doing what is right. This has been brought to my attention recently. If I have convictions to do what is right, I shouldn't tell someone "I'm sorry." We do not have to apologize for God. If He works through us, we should not apologize for it. We need to just obey His promptings and leave the rest to Him.

I've seen people apologize for acting in a way that their natural personality functions. That is not something to be sorry about. God made us all different to fill different needs. Of course we all have strengths and weaknesses. God will show us those weak areas of our personalities that we need to surrender to Him to bring maturity. When we fall into the weaknesses, then an apology may be in order, but we need to trust God that He will use those times to fine tune our strengths. We should never apologize for using strengths that others do not have. They need us! We need them! When we realize that, we will not be offended or feel that we have to always say "I'm sorry."

Post Thanksgiving Ponderings

Happy Thanksgiving! Yes, the day we call "Thanksgiving" in America is over for this year, but thanksgiving itself needs to abound within us every day of our lives. This should be a reminder for us to show an attitude of gratitude to all with whom we come in contact. God has stirred me to thank my children more when I ask them to do something. Even though they are to obey me, because I'm their mother, it is much more pleasant for all of us if I ask them pleasantly and respond with a loving "thank you." When we stop thanking people we start taking them for granted. I certainly don't want to take them for granted! (I learned that before they ever got here when I experienced years of infertility.)

It is important to thank people in our lives, but it is even more important to thank God. He is the source of our very existence! As Paul said in 1 Corinthians 15:57, "Thanks be to God, who gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." When we spend that time with God in close communion, thanksgiving will automatically flow to others out of the overflow God gives us. It is a cycle: thanksgiving to God leads to thanksgiving to people which leads to thanking God for people which brings us back to God!

Focus on God keeps this thanksgiving cylce going and keeps the motives of our hearts pure. Focus on people will stop the process and choke out gratitude from our hearts. Why? Because God is pure and people are not. God is the only One who will never let us down. Even our closest friends and relatives will let us down even if they don't intend to. When we focus on people, we start dwelling on their weaknesses and how they let us down. That's when seeds of offense start to take root and bitterness begins to fester.

I received a Thanksgiving e-card that had the following scripture passage on it: Colossians 3:12-17, "Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. 14 But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. 15 And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. 17 And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him."

Notice verse 13 says that we must forgive. We have to if we want that cycle of thanksgiving, that brings peace and joy, to keep going. Hopefully Thanksgiving was a time that reminded us to do a gratitude check. This passage tells us a list of things to "put on" that will encourage gratitude. If while we do our post-Thanksgiving check we find more offense than thanksgiving, we may need to go up a few verses and find out what we have to "put off" before we can "put on" all the good stuff! I'll let you do that for yourself. The whole chapter of Colossians 3 is rich with awesome nuggets of gold! Happy mining!!